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| 1959 Paul Newman |
Minulla on aina ollut hyvä kasvomuisti,mutta nimet tuppaavat hukkautumaan nuppini ylipursuavan tietopankin kovalevylle. Joku aivotoimintaa tietävämpi oli vihjaissut,ettei kyseessä ole aina ikäiselläni dementia,vaan aivojen oman valikointisysteemi,missä vähemmän tarpeelliset tietokansiot automaattisesti piiloutuvat tärkeimpien kansioiden alakansioiksi..
Onko selitys sitten totuudenmukaista,kun illalla punkassa klikkaan Taivaskanavalta juuri alkaneen mustavalkofilmin,missä tuttukasvoinen,komea nuorimies,nimeltään Cincinnati Kid pelaa biljardia amerikkalaisessa tupakansavuisessa Pool Hallissa..
Kysyn rouvalta:
--Do you know this actor...his name is at the tip of my tongue...Anthony..John...whoever...but I know his wife is Joanne Woodward..!?
Rouva:
--No.. I do remember his son out of wedlock Matthew McConnouhgty..looks like his Dad..and his real legitimate son with Joanne Woodward died young in a motor accident..
--And he never looked like his Dad..meaning the dead son..
Minä:
--Let me think of it..or better let me not think of it..because if I think of it I never catch the name....it will pop up later...
Parin minuutin perästä kieleni päälle lipsahtaa nimi..:
--Paul...Paul Newman...bloody hell why it is so tough to rememeber such a short name..
--His face is all over the Cinema World..and I could spot his voice anywhere even with my eyes folded..
--His own legitimate son looked more like his Mom Joanne Woodward..
Minä:
--By the way..do you remember Richard Woodward.the British actor in that American 1980s TV series Exterminator..or Eliminator or whatever..Nator name it carried?
Rouva:
--Yes..we watched it in Saudi, he is not related to Joanne Woodward..
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| Charles Bronson |
Olin jo keittiössä kuullut Bruce Willisin äänen ja huutanut rouvalleni makuuhuoneeseen:
--Bruce Willis never acted in Cincinnati Kid...he was too young then in late 1950s..about 5 years younger than I am..
Rouva:
No..I changed the film..I never liked old black and white movies like you do..
--This one is better...and Bruce Willis looks like you..with bald head and long upper lip..
Minä:
--Yes..that is what you think..and once you said I sound like Charles Bronson..probably I am a mutation or both..a Bruce Bronson or a Charles Willis..
--What was the name of Bruce Willis' ex-wife ..I never remember her name..the dark-haired,nice-boobed and nice-bodied....?
Rouva:
--Stop it...with your nicieties...Demi Moore..!
--I never liked her!
--A mental basket case..
Minä:
--If I do not recall her name,she cannot be so important..as a mental basket..
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| 1963 Odessa File |
--Come here...they are showing John Voight in an old colored film..Odessa!
Minä:
--That is one of my favorites..but I have seen it more than ten times!
Rouva:
--His daughter is Angelina Jolie..Brad Pitt's wife..who collects poor multicultural babies..
Minä:
--She never needed Botox in her lips,because her lips were one or two sizes bigger than required..kinda puffy lips..
Minä:
--Tell me what car is John Voight driving in that film?
--I dunno...one is an old top-down with bulbous fenders..like a bathtub upside down and the other one is a long-nosed sports car with Chinese eyes..meaning its chinky headlights..
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| 1961 jaguar E Type |
--The bathtub is a 1958 Mercedes-Benz 220 Cabriolet and the long-nosed Intsek (Chinese) is a 1961 Jaguar E-type..
Rouva:
--You know your cars and I know my filmstars!
Minä:
--I also know quite a lot of cars of filmstars!
--Did you know Clark Cable dtove a 1936 Duesenberg?
Rouva:
--He could have driven an Iceberg Lettuce or a Pumpkin Wagon..I do not care..
--Shut up..I am watching!
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| 1938 Clark Cable and Duesenberg |
--Who was his wife...I mean Clark Cable's not Duesenberg's?
Rouva:
--Carol Lombard..she died in an airplane accident!
--Could you stop now bothering me!?
Puolisen tunnin kuluttua rouvani huutaa makuukamarista:
--In E News..Ooh My God!!
--Melanie Griffith looks like a real griffith with her oversized and puffy red lips!
Minä:
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| Melanie Griffith |
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| Tippi Hedren in Birds |
--Alfred had a obsessive crush on her!
Rouva:
--I had a crush on that husband of Melanie Griffith..the Spanish speaking pogi (handsome) guy....what was his name..Antonio Banderol,Bandaid,Bandwagon,Ponderosa?....Antonio Banderas..!
Minä:
--He was not that handsome in Shrek 2 as Pussy in Boots...grooming and licking his small cat dick in front of all the royal court audience..
--A feline exhibitionist!
Rouva:
--You've got to boy cats..you know it better..
Minä:
--One neutered without balls and one with balls..
Rouva:
--Shut up or I break your balls!
Minä:
--Who sang that Great Balls of Fire?..Jerry Lewis?
Rouva:
--Jerry Lee Lewis..not the Jerry Lewis with rubber face..you remember Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hide?
--Yes..Great Rubber Balls of Fire!
--Shut up with your twisted mind and come to bed now!
--And wash them BALLS before you come!
--Your Jockeys (Briefs) already smell IHI (urine)!
--You better check out with our GP..you might have a prostate cancer..sprinkling IHI all around toilet seat and bowl..
Minä:
--Yes Mam ...whatever you say..
--After one or two minutes..love!
Parin minuutin kuluttua makuuhuoneesta kuului kuorsausta ,Diehardin laukaustenvaihtoa ja poliisikopterin roottorin lapojen läiskettä..
Minä kuiskasin olkkarista:
--Good night Sweetheart!!
--What is the real name of the main actor in Good Night Sweetheart,who also was Rodney in Fools and Horses?
Kuorsauksen välistä kuului kuiskausÖ
--Landhurst...?
--You tell me the first name?
Minä:
--David or as his street-sweeper friend in Fools and Horses..what was his name..called Rodney..Dave.
--Call me Dave!
Rouva unisesti:
--No.. he is real name Nicholas Lyndhurst
--David Niven in 80 Days around the World and David Jensen in Fugitive...and Prime Minister David Camerooooon of "Englandland"... in Downing Street 10!
--Everybody is called Dave..
Makuuhuoneen tauluteevestä kuului sen perästä vain sireenien vinguntaa ja Harley-Davidsonin päkätystä poliisipartion saapuessa rikospaikalle.
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| Niccholas Lyndhurst |
THE END
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